Lately Gingy and I have been having a lot of fun out in the pasture together at liberty no less. I think the reason we're able to be at liberty on a regular basis now lies in one word, focus. It's taken me quite awhile to realize just how important this thing called focus really is and I still feel like I'm on the tip of the iceberg, yet this new "aha" has helped me and Gingy to really make some progress in our relationship.
For some reason subconsciously I think of Gingy as resenting me, but I think that a lot of the behavior I labeled as resentful behavior didn't have anything to do with whether Gingy liked me or not. Every time he would leave me I would think, "oh he doesn't like me, I've offended him." Now I'm beginning to look at it more as, "Oh, he didn't want to think that hard and he thought leaving would help him to avoid focusing." When I look at it that way, I can clearly see what I need to do next. I need to help him stay focused and forget about all of the other little things that distract him such as: food, the other horses, etc.
Knowing what needs to be done is half the battle and of course the other half is doing it. Experimentation was certainly in order. First, I tried slapping my carrot stick on the ground and even against trees, no response to that. Then I tried using my voice, this also had no affect on him what so ever. I eventually found that for him it was all about building the suspense. I would creep up on him and as soon as he even looked my way I would turn around, just briefly since it only took him 1 second to lose interest again. The closer I got to him and the more I did this the more engaged he became. Of course there comes a point when you can't settled for 40 percent effort and for me that time came when I was close enough to actually touch him with the string on my carrot stick. When I managed to get that close and he still wasn't giving me more than a glance I would jump towards him without warning. The first time I did this I felt like I was really out on the limb, in fact I figured he'd run for the hills but he didn't. That's where the suspense I was talking about comes in, as I gradually got closer and gradually drew his attention to me, I was actually preparing him to look to me when I startle him which is what he did. He actually came right over to me good expression and everything, I was surprised.
Once I was in the spotlight of his mind we could move on to trying things. First I tried companion walking with him and that was a success. To say it was successful is actually an understatement it was the best companion walking I've ever done with Gingy because I truly felt like he was stuck to me. If I even walked faster he would trot to stay at my side, the feeling that comes with that kind of connection is just indescribable. I know for some people this would not be a very exciting thing, but for two souls struggling to find harmony it was a sacred moment.
We still had moments of uncertainty and those mostly came when I started stretching the physical distance between us. The goal is to be farther apart physically, yet closer together emotionally and that is what makes it tricky. The farther out Gingy was the more he seemed to forget about me. Things got worse before they got better, but we stuck it out. I'll never forget the moment when I knew I was losing him because he was getting too far away. I called out to him in desperation, the words came straight from my heart, "Don't forget me, don't forget me." I didn't expect that feeble attempt to have much effect, but he actually stopped in his tracks. I invited him to me and he came. There we stood together his head resting in my arms against my chest. I cried, he licked his lips. It's rare to have two perfect moments in one session, but we did that day, it's a day I'll never forget.
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